# Losing Hope :(



## jackdawsonsgrl (Aug 15, 2013)

So, it's been a month now with Betsy and she stills curls up in a ball and hisses when I hold her  I have a shirt in there and she sleeps in it, but she just doesn't seem to associate it with me  

And honestly, I have been so discouraged lately that I haven't held her in two days because I feel like when I do hold her it just stresses her out. I hate seeing her hiss and hide! I don't want her to be afraid 

Help?


----------



## abbys (Oct 13, 2012)

Not handling her daily only makes it worse. Even if you just have her sleeping on your lap in a blanket, she needs to have contact with you.

What time do you take her out? Do you have any other pets? How old is she?


----------



## zamxonk (Mar 6, 2013)

Yeah, would you tell us a little about what you have been doing when you handle your hedgie? What do you do at night when she is active? Do you take her out in the day at all? Do you change out the shirt in her cage with one that you have worn for several days/nights in a row? Does she ever sleep on you?


----------



## Kizzynicole (Mar 5, 2013)

Two months isn't nearly enough time to be giving up =) Sometimes it can take them many many months. When they do come around though it's worth it even with just a little progress!! It took me about 5 maybe 6 months to see any real progress with mine. He was a ball and now he's a hedgie most of the time. I just took him out and set him on my lap in his bag and he would sleep and I would talk to him quietly about my whole life story then watch tv or read until I needed to go to bed. Bath time was the real progress though. He started trusting me more and more after each time I saved him from that bath water! After bath bonding has become our favorite!!

It takes time but don't give up! I don't think mine will ever really cuddle but he's a great listener and even if he starts huffing and clicking at me I just sit still and keep talking softly. He eventually calms back down and goes to sleep. We've made a lot of progress and I didn't really see it until my fiance's mom mentioned how much more he looks like he trusts me now. It can happen, it may be slow and it may not turn out perfectly but just deeps breaths and go hold that hedgie! =D


----------



## jackdawsonsgrl (Aug 15, 2013)

When I take her out I usually hold her in my hands or lay her in my lap. Sometimes I set her on the floor and wait for her to emerge and explore a bit.

I do have a cat. She doesn't bother the hedgie though. She just sits on my bed and watches her. Other than that she doesn't go near it.

I'll keep trying! It's just hard. But thank you for the responses!


----------



## grins&needles (Sep 10, 2013)

From where did Betsy come?

Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## jackdawsonsgrl (Aug 15, 2013)

A young couple moving to new appts. that didn't allow pets


----------



## Chloethehedgie7 (Jul 24, 2013)

Try this:

Give her a bath.
Try bonding with her after her bath, while you are drying her off.
Make sure the temp in the room is 75, because hedgehogs get often mean when it's cold.
Feed her some fruit and veggies like, cooked carrots, watermelon. etc.

Always try to handle her carefully because if not, she likely won't want you.
I have had excperience with this so many times, so LOL, believe me  haha they can get discouraged sometimes.

Hope this helped,
Katie (ChloeTheHedgie7)


----------



## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

When you get her out, try leaving her covered in your lap. Let her sit in your hands or lap underneath a blanket - it'll make her feel more secure, and she may be more willing to unball and take a look around. Let her become comfortable with moving around & exploring your lap (or sleeping, which is a great thing to see with nervous hedgies!) while she's under the blanket, then slowly start moving her to doing so without the blanket over here. It may take a bit more time. But just go slow with her, and try to be patient...She sounds pretty nervous, and for all she knows, you might still be planning to eat her. :lol: Keeping her covered will make her feel safer, like I said, and once she realizes she can come out under the blanket & not be eaten, she should get a bit more confidence. Likewise if she goes to sleep under the blanket - that means she feels comfortable enough that her "bed" won't eat her, and she'll associate your smell with a nice, cozy nap. 

One last thing - try to keep lights low, if possible, since bright lights can bother them. And it can help if you have a bit of low background noise on, to cover little sounds you might make - a tv show or radio would work.


----------



## zamxonk (Mar 6, 2013)

My hedgie was super shy at first. My home also has cats, and his breeder does not. I think getting used to the ambient smell of predators can take them a while. 

Babies sleep a lot, so your hedgie might just not be awake enough to explore. Try dimming the lights down as well - some hedgies are more photosensitive than others.

Do you periodically replace the shirt with one you've worn a few times? I like to give Ambrose ones I've worn to bed a few night in a row - minimizes other environmental smells, and the sheets and blankets trap my scent to super-infuse the shirt. I use the same laundry soap for me and for him, so he's used to that factor.

Do you ever take her out in the day (her sleep-time) in a snuggle sack and do something quiet (read, watch tv, surf the internet, etc) while she sleeps? If you put the snuggle sack under your shirt, she'll stay warm and smell you. If the noises of pages turning or keystrokes bother her, playing music quietly can help minimize startles from sudden noises by providing a background.

I have so been there, crying on my floor staring at the spikey ball of hiss wondering if I made the wrong choice. Don't give up! Prove to your hedgie that she can trust you. She may not love everything you do (Ambrose still spikes me and nips me when I have him in my hands too much, because he prefers to run around independently), but you'll find those interactions that are awesome for both of you, and when that happens...well, it's hedgie love, yeah?


----------



## Tamoshanter (Jun 27, 2013)

Please don't give up! When I got my first hedgie, Hubble I was told he was barely a year old, and was super friendly after you got to know him... Wrong and wrong! He was almost three and he was only social after he trusted me. He would huff, pop, click and regularly tried to "spike" me. I got him from his second owner and she said her sister first bought him from a pet store, which means he probably came from a mill or at least a breeder who did care that much. Since you said that you are at least his/her second owner (maybe more?) and you don't know if he came from a great breeder who handled the babies, a mill or a pet store don't be too hard on your little quill ball! He probably has some major trust issues and is scared of the new environment and maybe just scared of being handled at all! If you are calm and gentle and PERSISTENT AND DON'T QUIT ON HIM! He will realize you won't hurt him and he can trust you! 

For me it took months for Hubble to play with me, and at the start of each play session he wanted to make it clear he was a grouchy old man and was quite snotty :lol: Give it some time and be patient! you won't regret it!


----------

