# Two Sense on posting



## silvercat (Oct 24, 2008)

I started this message as a reply in "Wanted: Breeder near Cincinnati ~2 hours" but then felt my message was more appropriate in it's own thread.



Lilysmommy said:


> It looks like the kiln-dried pine pellets that I bought from Gail to use for bedding the first few months I had Lily. It's what Gail uses for bedding for her moms and babies.
> I think a better way to go about letting a busy guy like him explore would just be to hedgie-proof a small room, . . . To solve the climbing thing, people have suggested getting soft plastic place mats and weaving them through the wires so he can't get a grip on them. Other ideas would zip-tying coroplast or something similar over the lower few inches of wire so he can't climb.





Lilysmommy said:


> We're very glad that you're willing to listen, and thank you for that.  Sometimes people would prefer to just argue and insist that they're right rather than listen to advice that could help their hedgehog, and it gets very frustrating for those trying to help them...


Just an observation from forum use. Often times when a hedgehogh owner (or potential owner) comes on explaining their set up & hedgehogh activities many others on HHC are very quick to say "DON'T DO THAT!!!" without ever calmly explaining an alertnative.  It often leaves the OP feeling very judged and as a result, defensive.

Good job Lilysmommy on going the extra step & explaining calmly why something shouldn't be done & alternatives. 

HHC is a great resource for hedgie lovers. With each forum and group that exists online, there's a range of information. That information is going to change around the world to depending on where the majority of users are. Some practices are definately better than others. I want to stress how important it is to go past "DON"T DO THAT" to a new (or even vetran) owner and provide reasoning and alternatives in a calm manner. People can become defensive and we all know adding fuel to a fire doesn't work. When the best interest of a small animal is the issue, it's important that the care taker understands why & not that they're being threatened for making mistakes.

Just my two sense. :roll:


----------



## LarryT (May 12, 2009)

Some people need to be told don't do that for there hedgies sake.


----------



## silvercat (Oct 24, 2008)

Oh I agree! But I think it should farther than that to "don't do that because.... you should/could .... instead"


----------



## LarryT (May 12, 2009)

silvercat said:


> Oh I agree! But I think it should farther than that to "don't do that because.... you should/could .... instead"


Agreed  people don't want to be treated like they are children


----------



## sagesmommy (Sep 25, 2008)

I agree 110% !!! I have always felt that way and it erks me when people are getting put down for there questions " DON'T DO THAT" or " Didn't you do any research AT ALL?!" really does not help the situation and can cause people to not want to participate on the forum. Thank you for posting this!


----------



## hoglet (Mar 13, 2009)

Completely agree - especially as a new user just looking for the right advice. Although I've had nothing but constructive advice and help (which I am SO thankful for), I have read some rather nasty responses to someone simply looking for help. It is unfair to judge someone's amount of research as there is a lot of conflicting information out there and it wasn't until I got here that I was able to get the correct information. I have been afraid of asking a question for fear of being blasted from a dizzy height! It is completely understandable that people care about hedgehogs, but that is the exact reason newcomers are here - to do right by their little dears! Well that is at least my reason!

I LOVE this forum and wouldn't have a clue what to do if you guys weren't here to help! There is nothing like first hand information and it is amazing! Thanks to all who have made my Hedgehog Central Forum a pleasant one.


----------



## dorasdaddy (Dec 23, 2008)

The people that are simply asking questions or trying to get advice arent the problem, it is the ones that either blatantly ignore the advice they are given, or argue with the people that they asked for advice in the first place. I know that i am one of the main culprits everyone is talking about, but there is at least one person in this very thread that values my viewpoint and that is evidenced by the pm's that i have recieved. It seems that slot of people want me to play devils advocate and that is fine, but dont support me in pm if you are just going to turn around and question my methods in public forum.


----------



## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

Thanks for the acknowledgement, silvercat. I try to just explain reasons why and be calm for new users, but dorasdaddy is right, I can see where it would get very frustrating to try and talk to people who don't seem to want to listen, or who are stubbornly keeping up beliefs that could hurt the hedgehog. We all just want to do right by the animals, but we just have to keep in mind that we should use the "sugar" approach first, and use a firmer tone only if the person refuses to listen. It seems like it'd make it more likely that we'll get listened to if we explain the reasons behind the "rules".


----------



## dorasdaddy (Dec 23, 2008)

Thank you very much Kelsey, I hope everyone sees that i am not just out and out mean to people...it is the ones that refuse to follow the advice given...the advice they ASKED for, to the detriment of their hedgehogs.....that is the select few that i call out.


----------



## sagesmommy (Sep 25, 2008)

i don't think this thread was talking about the people that blatantly go against given advice. I think it was more for new comers , people that maybe even only have one post , that get bashed instantly. I think everyone knows that if someone is not following advice or outright says they know something is wrong but will do it anyways everyone is right behind you , ( not anyone specific just hypothetically) but when it is done with some one new , it looks mean. That is my opinion


----------



## silvercat (Oct 24, 2008)

sagesmommy said:


> i don't think this thread was talking about the people that blatantly go against given advice. I think it was more for new comers , people that maybe even only have one post , that get bashed instantly. I think everyone knows that if someone is not following advice or outright says they know something is wrong but will do it anyways everyone is right behind you , ( not anyone specific just hypothetically) but when it is done with some one new , it looks mean. That is my opinion


That's pretty much what I was getting at. I think it goes past 'being mean' though to being unhelpful and actually hindering. First question you have a bunch of people scream no to you without telling alternatives doesn't help you to ask future questions


----------



## LarryT (May 12, 2009)

People are people  we all are different  and will never agree on everything


----------



## sagesmommy (Sep 25, 2008)

haha true true!


----------

