# My little girl just passed away...



## Draenog (Feb 27, 2012)

As some of you might have read here viewtopic.php?f=27&t=16701 my little hedgie got sick last weekend. I thought she was trying to hibernate, and because she stopped eating I went to the vet. He gave me antibiotics for her because he found one particular bacteria in her poop. And a/d food because she was too thin. 
Everything seemed to go well, back home she started eating again, she really liked the a/d food also and took her meds without any problems. She became more active and even more herself again (a bit more grumpy when I woke her up during the day). 
This morning and midday I gave her her meds and food and she even walked a bit around, everything seemed okay. But an hour ago I saw her walking out of her sleeping place, she went to the food/water bowls and lay down next to them. Then she drank some water, and lay down again. She never lays there so I picked her up and she felt a little bit cooler than normal. I took her under my shirt and cuddled a bit. When I took her out, she felt weak, getting weaker. I tried to put her back on her feet but she just fell down on her side, eyes open, doing nothing. I saw that her breathing became more unsteady, then she started to "yawn" (it looked like a yawn - she opened her mouth real far and closed it again, and did this a few times) then she stopped and it was over... it all happened very fast, within not even three minutes.

I just sat there with her in my arms, I couldn't stop crying, I didn't believe it was over now just when I thought she was getting better. I have no idea what happened or what was wrong, maybe there was just something more going on than only the bacteria. I think she never really tried to hibernate (because she never really slept, like hibernating hedgehogs do) but it was just because she was sick. But I really thought she was going better, and then all of a sudden this happens... my little girl... I'm going to miss her so much.


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## zorropirate (Aug 13, 2010)

I am so sorry!

HUGS.


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## Rainy (Jul 27, 2011)

Oh no. I read your post with tears in my eyes. I know you've been taking her to the vet and getting her the best treatment. I'm so sorry for your loss. But, I am very glad that you got to be with her during her last moments. I'm sure that meant a lot to her and to you. HUGS.


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## LizardGirl (Aug 25, 2008)

I am so so sorry, that is devastating, and even more so since it was unexpected. You did everything you could. (hugs)


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## Draenog (Feb 27, 2012)

Thanks all, I'm already missing her, she was my funny little girl... so friendly and lovable. And now it's all over, so suddenly. And yes, maybe this is a better way than finding her in her cage, but at the same time I felt so useless... there was nothing I could do but watch her die... my poor little girl. At least she went quick, and I hope it was painless, but it hurts so much. My little girl.


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## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

I'm so sorry.


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## GoodandPlenty (Feb 4, 2012)

Being there. Not being there. A terrible thing either way. Still, there will be comfort in knowing - really knowing - that she went gently and comfortably.


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## LarryT (May 12, 2009)

So sorry for your loss.  
Big hugs


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## Draenog (Feb 27, 2012)

GoodandPlenty said:


> Being there. Not being there. A terrible thing either way. Still, there will be comfort in knowing - really knowing - that she went gently and comfortably.


True, I think I would rather be there, and even though I felt useless, there was indeed nothing I could do for her but try to comfort her at last.

Thanks for all the support. It's still hard to look at her photo's  I will stick around here though, to see all the lovely pictures of other hedgies. Maybe somewhere in the future there will be another one for me as well.

But first I have to bury her, I think I'll go and bury her in the garden, and buy a special plant/flowers to place on her grave.


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## Melanie (Jan 2, 2012)

I'm so sorry!!! 

Sent from my Kindle Fire using Tapatalk


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## vasogoma (Feb 25, 2012)

Draenog, I am so sorry for your loss, I know that even if you were together only for a short time you loved her deeply and losing her must still be very difficult for you. I cried as I read, and cried even more when I thought about going through about how fragile life is and how easily it could be to lose any of my pets, Agatha included.

I have a couple of advices for you. First of all, cry all you want, don't stop if you still need to cry, and even after that cry some more. Crying will help you feel better eventually, while not crying enough will make you feel even worse later on. Second, do not buy a new pet until you feel completely ready for that, buying to "replace" will only make the pain greater and in most cases you won't be able to give your new pet enough love. And third, be glad with yourself for the fact that you did everything you could and that she received love even during her last minutes of life.

If you need someone to talk to I am always here, and I hope you feel better soon.


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## Draenog (Feb 27, 2012)

Thanks for all the kind words, it's really helping me.  And yes, nothing wrong with crying. I've already cried a lot, and I can now look at her pictures with dry eyes, but I'll cry more for sure, I see no problem in that don't worry. And about replacing, she can't be 'replaced'. She was my first hedgie and I absolutely loved her and she showed me how it is to have a hedgehog as a pet, and they are great. I'm not going to search for a new one, I'll see where it takes me, maybe I'll find one on my way, which can be in the next few months, or maybe even years. We'll see.


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## cthom (Nov 15, 2011)

im so sorry, i hate seeing these threads.
all the best big hugs and cudddles.


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## AngelicDarkness (Feb 10, 2012)

Draenog: I'm so sorry for your loss. I have tears just reading these posts. Rip little one.


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## Mau (Feb 21, 2012)

I am so, so sorry for the loss of your girl. My heart is breaking for you. 

I lost my dear cat in my arms a long time ago and it was so hard. Losing an animal in your arms is so, so hard. 

I hope you are doing ok.


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## KatelynAlysa (Nov 25, 2011)

So sorry for your loss!


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## Sar-uh (Sep 6, 2011)

How heartbreaking  I'm so sorry for your loss. It sounds like you did everything you could.


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## Draenog (Feb 27, 2012)

I buried her in the garden today. It's still hard but getting better, even though I keep thinking/doing things like "Oh I have to check the temperature" or "why isn't the light on?" (I plugged it out of course).

And sometimes I'm thinking "well what if I buy a new hedgehog soon?" but I won't do that, because I know I will feel disappointed if the new one will not be that friendly/cuddling for example and that's just not fair. He/she should have a fresh start, so I'm not going to search for hedgies soon. 
Also, I already wanted to make new things for her (a new wheel, sleeping bags and other stuff) so I promised myself I have to finish all this before I buy a new one. That will take some time as well.

I think I'm going to make a print of the picture I posted in this thread, it is one of my favourites.



Mau said:


> I am so, so sorry for the loss of your girl. My heart is breaking for you.
> 
> I lost my dear cat in my arms a long time ago and it was so hard. Losing an animal in your arms is so, so hard.
> 
> I hope you are doing ok.


Sorry to hear about your cat, and yes it's hard.


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## Nancy (Aug 22, 2008)

I'm so sorry she did not make it. You tried your best. 

You will know when the time is right for another and one may find you when you least expect it. Some people are not ready for another soon after the loss, but others want one immediately. Everyone is different. Some people feel getting another one soon is disloyal or a replacement for the one that passed but I feel it is a tribute that we love hedgehogs and the former hedgehog so much that our life is not complete without another. The new one is in no way a replacement but can help heal the emptiness. The new one will do things the one we lost did and we will fondly remember. When the new one does something the other never did, we think, wow, ____ never did that. You will know when it's time and that may be tomorrow or next year. 

Hugs


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## shetland (Sep 2, 2008)

I am so sorry. Your little girl was not a neglected hedgie. She received medical care and the best of care at her home. And she was loved. I am quite sure she knows how much you loved her and that you were with her when she crossed to her new world. She is again healthy and able to play. She will make new friends. You will begin the long process of healing. Allow yourself to take the time to cry and do what makes you feel better. It will always hurt, but how wonderful that she was and always will be a part of your life.


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## GoldenEyes (Nov 4, 2011)

OMG.. I teared up reading this, Im so sorry for your loss, that must be so difficult.


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## Draenog (Feb 27, 2012)

Thanks again for the kind words, all of you. I'm still tearing up when I read them. 



Nancy said:


> I'm so sorry she did not make it. You tried your best.
> 
> You will know when the time is right for another and one may find you when you least expect it. Some people are not ready for another soon after the loss, but others want one immediately. Everyone is different. Some people feel getting another one soon is disloyal or a replacement for the one that passed but I feel it is a tribute that we love hedgehogs and the former hedgehog so much that our life is not complete without another. The new one is in no way a replacement but can help heal the emptiness. The new one will do things the one we lost did and we will fondly remember. When the new one does something the other never did, we think, wow, ____ never did that. You will know when it's time and that may be tomorrow or next year.
> 
> Hugs


I found my little girl when I didn't expect it as well  I think those things come naturally in some way. I've started reading about having hedgehogs as pets around 2 years ago, but last summer I went to another country for 5 months and that was already planned long before, so I had to wait. But at the beginning of this year I found myself looking up pictures of hedgehogs, thinking again about them, etcetera. Then I saw an ad from someone who couldn't keep her hedgehog due to circumstances, and I immediately e-mailed her, and 2 days later I came to visit her to see the hedgehog and the day after we picked her up. So it all went really quick at last.

And yes, everyone is different, but for me it doesn't feel good right now and I think that will last for a while. I agree on your post, but for me it's still too soon, we'll see what the future brings.



shetland said:


> I am so sorry. Your little girl was not a neglected hedgie. She received medical care and the best of care at her home. And she was loved. I am quite sure she knows how much you loved her and that you were with her when she crossed to her new world. She is again healthy and able to play. She will make new friends. You will begin the long process of healing. Allow yourself to take the time to cry and do what makes you feel better. It will always hurt, but how wonderful that she was and always will be a part of your life.


Even though I'm not a believer, this is a beautiful thought.


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## PJM (May 7, 2010)

I'm so very sorry. I was just catching up on the posts that I haven't had a chance to read & was enjoying her thread with all the beautiful pictures. She really was so precious. You can tell she was loved very much. I'm so, so sorry that she left so soon. You gave her love & a wonderful home. I'm sure she was happy with you.


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## zombiewoman (Sep 22, 2011)

I am so sorry for the loss of your hedgie. I had been following your post and was glad to hear she was better. We just never know when it is our time. I am glad you could be with her when it was hers.


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## ReginasMommy (Apr 13, 2011)

I'm so sorry for your loss  It sounds like you were a wonderful parent to her and I'm sure she knew how much you loved her <3


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## Tabbikat (Dec 30, 2011)

I am so so so sorry for your loss! I just got julia 3 days ago and already I love her so much. 
It was really upsetting to read your post. My heart goes out to you!


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## DragonTamerJackson (Mar 4, 2012)

I am so sorry.


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## Draenog (Feb 27, 2012)

Thanks again all of you, I really appreciate it. I'm really glad I joined this forum, everyone is so friendly


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## Blake318 (Feb 29, 2012)

This made me tear up. As soon as I got done reading I immediately went to Eliza's cage and just held her. I'm so sorry


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## AtomicHedgie (Jan 20, 2012)

So sorry to hear about your loss! I also teared up when reading this


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## HAZARDxSTONE (Jan 23, 2012)

I'm so sorry for your loss.
Dealing with the death of a pet is never easy... and nothing anyone says really takes the pain away. It goes away with time, not fully, but the hole doesn't seem as big.

When I lost my cat 2 years ago (I had him for 13 years) I thought the pain of his loss would never fade. I assumed that I would never be getting another pet, for fear of losing them...

Then Cambria came along. I got her almost 2 months ago, and now I have a new experience to look forward to.

It took me two years to even think about getting a new pet, and I accept that the void he left will never be filled, but he will always be in my memory.

Don't rush it. Take all the time you need to grieve, I heard a song the other day that I listened to after hearing about my cat's passing, and it still made me cry. But it was out of love, not loss. You'll know when you're ready.


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## Blake318 (Feb 29, 2012)

This sounds exactly like what happened to my Eliza tonight. I know how you feel and you will be in my thoughts.


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