# Lily ~ 6/12/08 - 1/20/12



## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

I had to let my baby go this morning...The vet put her under in preparation for drawing some blood to check on liver enzymes. He felt her over before drawing blood, concerned by how dark and extensive the bruising on her neck was from last week's blood drawing. He could feel a mass in her abdomen that wasn't there last week. We were both concerned by how quickly it grew. Our options were surgery to see whether it was something that could be fixed, steroids to give her a bit more time, or euthanasia. I didn't want to risk surgery, since it was 50/50 of whether it was something removable or not, and I didn't want to have to let her go on the surgery table, without being with her and saying goodbye. With steroids, I didn't want to wait too long and have her suffering at all. She's not been feeling well for some time now...I couldn't let that continue. I chose to say goodbye to her and let her go peacefully. The vet did a quick necropsy afterwards and found that it was the right choice - her liver had 2/3 of it covered with tumors. 

I can't even explain what Lily meant to me...She was my first true pet that was all mine. That was how she started out anyway...Something that was mine alone to take care of and play with. She quickly became my first baby, to be spoiled rotten and given everything I could provide for her. She made me sure that taking care of animals is something I want to do forever, whether it's hedgehogs, cats, birds, or any other animals that need a home. 

She also taught me a huge lesson - to be prepared for a new animal before you bring it home, to know what you will be expected to provide, and what you can expect from the animal. I was a few months late on doing this for her, but there was no question about mending my ways and doing whatever she needed - I fell in love at first sight. At the breeder's house, she was the baby who, when I picked her up, curled up and went to sleep in my hand. I instantly knew who was coming home with me.

I've had many people tell me that they were amazed at how friendly and calm she was, the friendliest hedgehog they'd ever met. I've had people attribute it to the time I spent on her and the love I gave her. But I think I had very little to do with it. It was just Lily. I could go for days, even weeks of only having time to get her out for a few minutes in the evening to say hi and check her over. And the next time I was able to get her out for snuggles, she was just as loving as ever. She was the best hedgehog I could ever ask for, my sweet girl. She will always have a huge part of my heart, and will always be my first baby. I love you, Lily, and I hope you're feeling better again. Be nice to your grandma up there...She'll have to give you snuggles until I see you again.


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## Nancy (Aug 22, 2008)

Oh Kelsey. I am heartbroken for you. Poor Lily. She was such a beautiful girl and such a wonderful friend to you as your first true pet. She will be missed by all of us who knew her through your posts.

Love and hugs


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## Quinn (Apr 24, 2011)

I'm so sorry. Reading that actually brought tears to my eyes. I can't imagine how you would feel. Lily was greatly loved and she knew it.


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## Kalandra (Aug 25, 2008)

Kelsey, I'm so sorry you had to make that decision. It is the hardest one we ever have to make for them. She fought hard, and sadly cancer is just a nasty thing. You did the right thing for her. I know it doesn't always feel that way, but please remember it was the right thing.

She will be missed, she will always be loved, and will always be a part of who you are.

One day, I'm sure another little hedgehog will find its way to you, and will benefit from all that Lily taught you.


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## LarryT (May 12, 2009)

So sorry, thinking of you, big hugs.


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## AL111 (Jan 11, 2012)

I am so sorry to hear this! My thoughts are with you right now as I know how difficult it can be to lose a pet. It sounds like you gave her a wonderful life. Rest in peace, Lily.


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## jerseymike1126 (Jan 20, 2011)

lilly couldn't have had a better owner...my condolences


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## shaelikestaquitos (Feb 2, 2010)

I'm so sorry for your loss  You were a good hedgie mama, and you gave her the best life she could have ever had <3


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## KatelynAlysa (Nov 25, 2011)

I'm so sorry to hear about Lily. Your post also brought tears to my eyes. She could not have had a better owner, the time and effort you put into giving her the best life possible is amazing. I am so, so sorry for your loss.

Katie


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## ReginasMommy (Apr 13, 2011)

Oh no, I'm so sorry  Lily was a sweet, wonderful girl and I'm sure she knew how much you loved her. I bet she's running and nomming and completely healthy over the rainbow bridge  My thoughts are with you. *Hugs*


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## Nebular (Dec 28, 2010)

I's so sorry to hear about the loss of Lily.


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## cynthb (Aug 28, 2008)

I'm so sorry  Lily was a sweet, loving girl, and you were right for each other. It's an awful decision, but she's in no more pain.


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## MomLady (Aug 14, 2010)

My thoughts are with you.

I am so sorry.

Rest in peace little Lily.

Love and Hugs, 

Donna and Nara


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## Tara151 (Jan 9, 2012)

Very sorry for your loss.


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## cthom (Nov 15, 2011)

sorry dosent seem like enough. 
give your heart time to heal and grive because you deserve it.
im sorry for your loss. hugs and snuggles sent your way.


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## Christemo (Oct 5, 2011)




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## TeddysMommy (Apr 24, 2011)

Oh Kelsey, I'm so sorry, Yesterday I was thinking about Lily and was wondering. I know how much you miss her, but she will always be with you  As cthom said, sorry doesn't feel like enough, If you need anyone I will be here  She was the one who started it all, helped us meet you and made all of us great friends with you.


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## Immortalia (Jan 24, 2009)

Oh no  My heart stopped when I came here and saw that this was the first thread on the top of the page.  *hugs* I'm so sorry. At least now she can run around and be pain free.


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## PJM (May 7, 2010)

I'm so very sorry. 
My heart is breaking for you.


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## lpercz (Dec 23, 2010)

I'm so, so sorry. Stay strong! At least she isn't in pain anymore. <3


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## hanhan27 (May 12, 2011)

I'm so sorry Kelsey... Lily was a beautiful, personable hedgehog. You were luck to find each other and share such a wonderful bond. You made the right choice for her & she will love you always for that.

Hang in there, hun. I can't imagine how you're feeling. I bet your mom will start the bonding process with Lily tonight, though...  Big hugs from Milly and I.


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## Rainy (Jul 27, 2011)

Oh Kelsey, I'm so sorry to hear about Lily. It sounds like you made the right decision. Even when you have others around you for comfort, still losing such a lovely girl, it's hard to feel comforted. I pray that your heart can heal. You gave her the best of everything. God bless you and sending hugs your way.

Love,

Loraine


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## LizardGirl (Aug 25, 2008)

I can't even find words. Kelsey. I am so sorry...


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## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

Thanks everyone. Helps a little bit to see all of the responses, I kind of blinked in surprise when I saw how many this had, lol. I'm still kind of lost right now...I don't know what to do. I'm kind of glad I'm at my aunt's house right now, though. I don't want to go home and see my room with her cage just yet, though I'll have to tomorrow. I've been trying to decide if I want to leave it up for awhile or just pack it away or what. I have so much stuff for her, I don't know what I'm going to do with it all. :lol: I might hang onto everything (except the food, of course) for now. I'd like to get another hedgehog someday, definitely a rescue. I'm just not sure how soon, or what my dad would have to say about that. I just feel so lost with the idea of not having something more to take care of at home...I do still have the dog though. She'll probably be getting spoiled for awhile!

I also want to say thank you to all of you and I'm so glad I had the chance to get to know you all. I've definitely made some friends on here and I'd like to stay in touch. If anyone wants to add me on Facebook, feel free, just make sure you let me know who you are on here - http://www.facebook.com/fantasybookworm?ref=tn_tnmn I'm not sure yet how much I'll be on here, but I think I'll still hang around for awhile and answer questions and such. It'd feel too weird to just stop coming here altogether, even with as weird as it is to think about responding on here with no hedgehog to talk about anymore.


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## LarryT (May 12, 2009)

Please stick around! This place would never be the same without you.


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## zorropirate (Aug 13, 2010)

Kelsey,

I am so sorry. 



RIP sweet Lily!


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## readthebook2 (Jan 16, 2012)

I am so sorry for your loss. It sounds like Lily gave you some wonderful life lessons. The only downside of our pets is that they never stick around as long as we'd like them to-- take care of yourself.


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## Melanie (Jan 2, 2012)

My heart also dropped when I saw your post! Everyone else already said what I feel. I have also been through this recently and know your heart is breaking.....from what I have seen on here, following your thread, you are the BEST hedgie mom ever and I hope someday another hedgie is lucky enough to have you. So so sorry!

Sent from my Kindle Fire using Tapatalk


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## Immortalia (Jan 24, 2009)

I know how you feel about packing up. I think I left my cats stuff out and about for an extra month or two before I could finally deal with packing everything up. Just take your time. 

I think I finally came to term with things several months later, when I was finally able to call the cemetery guy and get him buried and his headstone made. Then I made my own memorial picture frame with those thick style ones. I'll look you up on fb when I get on my laptop and if you ever want to talk, feel free to pm


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## EinsteinsMama (Jan 18, 2012)

I'm so sorry about Lily.  

That's never an easy choice to make, but I'm so glad that Lily isn't hurting anymore. You and her are in my prayers tonight! <3


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## basmati (Feb 13, 2009)

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. You have inspired and helped so many on this forum with your enthusiasm and advice.


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## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

Thanks guys. This entire day, two big quotes have been sticking in my mind. The one I know I've heard on here from Nancy "Better an hour too soon than a minute too late.", which was what helped me make my decision. And this short exchange, which I always think about upon hearing about the death of any special animal - 
"It's the only bad thing about animals. Most don't live as long as we do." "I know, sweet. But think how bleak life would be without them."
It's from the book Squire, by my favorite author Tamora Pierce. It definitely applies to our sweet little hedgehogs. <3


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## moxieberry (Nov 30, 2011)

Lilysmommy said:


> "It's the only bad thing about animals. Most don't live as long as we do." "I know, sweet. But think how bleak life would be without them."
> It's from the book Squire, by my favorite author Tamora Pierce. It definitely applies to our sweet little hedgehogs. <3


I love Tamora Pierce! I read her books obsessively as a kid. <3

I think there's something kind of nice about their lives being shorter than ours, in a way. Obviously, it'd be wonderful to have an animal companion with you for much longer (forever, please!), but for animals that naturally live a very short time compared to us (such as hedgehogs), we get to experience the full stretch of their lives and appreciate every moment. Because we don't have them for as long as we'd want, and because we know from the very beginning that it will only be a small handful of years, we don't let the time we have with them slip by. The fact that it's so finite with hedgehogs, if anything, makes the time we have with them that much more precious.

You made a good decision, and I'm sure she would have thanked you if she'd had the words. This let her go on her own terms, and let you say goodbye, and have those last moments just the way they should have been. Hopefully you can take comfort in that, for whatever it's worth. :]


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## PJM (May 7, 2010)

We still mourn for Zoey. It does get easier, but I think that it always stays with you. We were fortunate enough to have Cholla to comfort us. And Pepper to focus our attention on. But I still cry when I miss Zoey. I will always miss her. 

There will never be another Lily. Ever. You were privileged to have the one and only Lily ever to be created. And because she shared her life with you, she will always be a part of you. I can tell that you have learned so much from her. Those lessons will stay with you for your entire life.


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## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

That's true, Moxieberry. I just wish that their lives weren't _quite_ so short! And I still read Tammy's books obsessively. :lol: I just love all of her characters, she's amazing at bringing them to life and creating new worlds.

PJ - I think about you guys and Zoey often, as well as a few others on here who've recently lost a hedgie. Lily will definitely always hold a very, very special place in my heart. I was so lucky to have her to teach me about how to be a good hedgiemommy (or petmommy in general). I have to wait a bit and get some finances straightened out, but I hope to PM you soon about ordering a painting. I just have to figure out which picture I want to use for it.


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## pearlthehedgie (Feb 15, 2011)

So sorry for your loss. She sounds like she was a very special girl. And lucky to have you for her human mommy!!


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## shetland (Sep 2, 2008)

Dear Kelsey, I am so very sorry. I watched you and Miss Lily grow and mature. She taught you so much about responsibility and you taught her about trust. You are learning at such a young age that life can be full of loss. I am so sorry you have to learn this so early. You are a wonderful person and your Mother is smiling down on you. Miss Lily is well now; young again and healthy. You gave her this gift because you love her. Take the time to be sad for what you are feeling; then you can start to be happy again knowing what you were privileged to have had. Come back to the forum; you have so much to offer others. I come here and I don't even have a hedgie. You would be missed terribly. Take care Kelsey.


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## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

Thanks Pearl. And thank you Shetland, I was wondering when you would see this. You always have something to say to make me feel better.  And don't worry...I plan on sticking around, even if it feels weird sometimes. I like helping too much, and it'll keep me up to date on the hedgie world for when I'm ready to get a new quillball.


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## mkm125 (Jun 20, 2011)

I am so sorry for your loss. The decision to take your baby's suffering into consideration before your own is to be applauded. Often one can get so overcome by the thought of losing their pet--they inadvertently prolong the pet's suffering to ease their own. I can see that you are young in terms of age from previous comments but you are clearly quite mature. There is a very lucky hedgie out there (someday)--waiting until you are ready. My thoughts are with you at this difficult time.


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## EllenLovesHedgies (Nov 23, 2011)

I'm so sorry for your loss. I always remembered seeing all those post about Lily and thinking how much you loved her and how much she loved you.  
RIP Lily the sweetgirl <3


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## ThePliny (Jun 3, 2010)

I am so sorry. I enjoyed reading about all your adventures with Lily, and you have been such a great source of information and reassurance to many of us on HHC.
You gave Lily an amazing life.


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## Hedgehogger (Dec 8, 2011)

It's always difficult to lose a pet. My cat lived or 16 years, and I got her as a little kitten. It was tough leaving her at the spca to get cremated. Sometimes getting another pet can help fill that void left behind.


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## Melanie (Jan 2, 2012)

I was afraid to say that in fear that you all would think badly of me. My sweet Prixie died from WHS about a week before Christmas. My husband and I were devastated and completely heartbroken. We went and got a new baby girl on New Years Day. My husband thought it was too soon and I was trying to replace her. I told him no, she could never be replaced! But in my grief I just really needed a new baby to love. We got so lucky and so far our little Biscuit loves to cuddle and is helping me get over my sadness. Giving your love to a new pet does help, that's all I wanted to.get across here, and we are spoiling her rotten. I know everyone handles things differently, but for me, getting a new baby hedgie helped me tremendously. I'm glad to see you still on here and helping people...

Sent from my Kindle Fire using Tapatalk


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## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

I don't think badly of you at all! Everyone's different in how they deal with their grief, and for some, a new little one to love and take care of helps them a lot. I've actually been thinking about that a lot. I definitely don't want another hedgehog right away. For one thing, I can't afford it (as far as possible vet bills...I need to save up a decent sized emergency fund first, which I never really did with Lily, but should've). And I'm not sure my dad would be on board with it either, and since I still live with him, I do need his permission. The other reason is I don't want to be unfair to a new hedgie. Lily was an amazing hedgie, always very calm about things, particularly baths and nail clipping, which can be such a challenge. I want to rescue my next hedgie, but I want to love that hedgie for him or herself, and not be disappointed in any way because they're not as sweet as Lily was. So I'm going to wait for awhile before thinking about a new hedgehog.

However...A friend of mine had a litter of baby rats unexpectedly born several weeks ago. She's still trying to find homes for four of the males and I'm kind of considering maybe getting two of them. From what I can tell (though I've done very little research), they're much less expensive than hedgehogs, and less sensitive in terms of lighting schedule, heating, etc. However, as much as I'd love to take a couple of the little guys, I still have to go through my dad, and I'm not sure how he'd feel about it. I'm hoping I can appeal to him though, I'm already feeling pretty lost without having something to take care of...


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## Melanie (Jan 2, 2012)

Awwww! I saw 2 of the cutest rats ever at the vet when I took our Biscuit for her 1st visit! Rats are awesome and very smart and trainable! I hope it works out for you!

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## Nancy (Aug 22, 2008)

Melanie, don't feel any guilt for wanting another hedgehog immediately. I am exactly the same way. It's not a replacement in any way, but IMO a tribute to the one who passed that we want another one so quickly. I find the new one helps heal as we see things in the new one that remind us of the one that passed, but the new one will also do things the other didn't do. 

Everyone is different and there is nothing wrong with getting another immediately, or waiting weeks, months or even years. Some people never want another because it hurts to much to loose them.


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## Melanie (Jan 2, 2012)

Thanks Nancy, that means a lot. And our new girl is so different, shes only my 2nd hedgehog but now I see what you all mean by how they all have such different personalities. I wish I knew about HHC long ago. My husband found this and since he registered me I have been addicted and read every single thing on here! You have all been so helpful in so many ways. This is a wonderful thing you are doing for hedgehogs. Nancy thanks for making me feel better and Kelsey my thoughts are with you! 

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## Hedgieonboard (Nov 15, 2009)

I just seen what happened and am so sorry for your loss. Even though I never met Lily I feel like I still knew her in a way from all the wonderful stories and pics you shared. Thank you so much for sharing her with everyone, she will be greatly missed but brought lots of joy. *Hugs


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## Kalandra (Aug 25, 2008)

Each person reacts differently. When the time is right, you will know it and a hedgehog that needs you will find its way back into your heart. Sometimes we tell ourselves that we are going to wait, and then one pops up and you suddenly find yourself with a hedgehog again. 

Melanie, I really haven't had any two hedgehogs that were a like yet. Yes I have had some that exhibited a similar trait, but they had their own unique piece that I had not encountered before in a hedgehog. The more you meet and care for the more you will learn from them, and they will keep you on your toes.

When I lost my first hedgehog, someone told me something that has stuck with me, and after having the pleasure to care for several now, I am a firm believer in those words. She said it to me in a much more poetic way, but here is the general gist....

These little ones touch us in ways that it can be hard for some to imagine. They burrow themselves deeply in our hearts. With each that passes, they take a piece of us with them. With each that blesses us with their presence, they add a piece of themselves. Those pieces never quite fit perfectly back together, leaving us a bit of a mess sometimes. But I for one am happy to have known them, loved them, and to be left a mess than to never have been there at all.


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## Melanie (Jan 2, 2012)

That was beautiful Kalandra and made me cry. 

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## Alastrina (Sep 18, 2009)

I have not been very active lately, but when I came here and saw this my heart sank. I have long held you and Lily up as the hedgie and hedgie momma relationship I would like to have with my quilly ones some day, and her passing was so sad to learn of. What you have done for her over the course of her life is nothing short of a demonstration of the purest love we can have for a companion, and your love for her was so obvious in the way you spoke of her and the pictures of her spoils and treats on special occasions.

The first one leaves little paw prints on your heart that never fade away. I think they all do this, no matter what form they take (cats, dogs, hedgies, etc). The pain does soften with time, but it is different for everyone how long that takes and how you will get there. I lost my first hedgie (Charley) last August, and I still cry when I think about him, and I talk to the painting of him the PJ made for me, it helps me to feel better connected to him and his memory. He was always there for me to talk to, and I'd like to think he still is. Charley showed me that with love and patience, a wonderful bond can form that will last a lifetime, no matter how long or short that life will be. 

Rest in peace Miss Lily, may your mealies be plentiful and the grass always soft beneath your feet.

~Katie


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## allisonh (Mar 31, 2010)

I am so sorry for the loss of your baby  when I read your post I couldn't stop crying. And now I'm still tearing up responding to it... Lily was such a lucky Hedgie. I am glad that you have so many good memories with her that you will always remember. To me losing a pet is so hard because they have no voice to tell you if they hurt when they are sick or to tell you they love you when you cuddle. But somehow we know! And I hope you know how much lily loved you! You sound like a wonderful Hedgie mom  Just know you gave her a good life up until the end when you didn't let her suffer. Stay strong and always keep her in your heart. Love Allison and Munchkin


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## tie-dye hedgie (Dec 19, 2009)

Oh my, I am so, so, so very sorry Kelsey. We all know how much you cared and loved Lily with all your heart. You did the most difficult, yet responsible, thing any pet owner can do. Rest in Peace Lily, Rest in Peace. ((Hugs))


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## Tabbikat (Dec 30, 2011)

Hi Kelsey;

I am really sorry to hear about Lilly! This is my very first post. I have been reading this forum for 2 months now and I have to say You stood out as one of the more caring posters. I still have to wait 4 weeks before I get my hedgie and I hope I will be as good a mom as you were to Lily!

Please don't leave this forum, Your experience is still of great value!


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## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

Awwww, thanks Tabbikat.   I'm sure you'll be an awesome hedgiemom! You'll have to post some pics and introduce your new little one once you get him/her. And don't worry, not leaving...I'm way too addicted to stop now, so you're all stuck with me! :lol:


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## alyssinreality (Jan 18, 2012)

I am so sorry for your loss. I hadn't realized that she passed so recently, considering I joined right around the same time and must have missed the thread. I just wanted to stop by to say that you seem like an amazing hedgie owner and I'm sure she was very happy. Also, she has the same birthday as me


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## Tasha (Feb 24, 2009)

I come in and out of this forum and missed this thread originally, but i didn't want to not send you all my love and hugs. I've been reading your threads about you and lily since i joined and im heartbroken for you.I feel like i know you! I don't really know what to say. In my thoughts and hope your doing ok. Rest in peace Lily. xxxxx


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## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

Thank you both for the good thoughts.


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## GoldenEyes (Nov 4, 2011)

Omg this literally broke my heart when I read it... I am so sorry to hear this.


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## joydivision_ (Dec 9, 2011)

I am so sorry  you're such a great mommy <3 thank you for being such a genuine, compassionate and helpful person, <3

love and hugs


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## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

Thank you both as well. Some of Lily's stuff is going to get shared this week - her dig box stones went to my betta fish's new tank (which he's very happy with), her baby food will be going to Wildside, and a friend of mine will get the cat food. I get sad whenever I put something of hers away or put it where it can get regular use rather than hedgehog use. But at least these things are going towards other animals, which makes me feel better.


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## mary ellen (Mar 1, 2011)

*Have you decided not to get another hedgehog or are you just going to wait a while?*


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## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

I'd actually love to get a rescue hog, but unfortunately my dad and I are on opposites sides of this - so since I'm still living in his house, he automatically wins. :roll: He does have a point though, I'm not in the best financial situation to take on another animal right now, so I'm trying not to be too disappointed about it. As soon as I'm able to though, I definitely plan on bringing another hedgie home. (And until then, Rainey's going to have to put up with me pestering her for visits with her hedgies. :lol: )


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