# Motivation and Pet Care



## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

Okay, so I just read a pretty fantastic post on Tumblr. It applies well to all pets and to anyone who wants to keep any kind of animal in their house. I wanted to share it here as it's not something that has popped up frequently, but I have seen a couple posts about people struggling with hedgehog care due to mental and/or physical illness, or even just lack of motivation. I think it's not uncommon, particularly for animals that don't necessarily give a lot in return. I know hedgehog owners put a lot of stock in the little steps forward with trust, but the fact is, they're not cuddly animals. I think that can make it hard to consistently provide them with handling time for at least 30 minutes, night after night, especially with particularly grumpy or defensive hedgehogs. It's easy to get discouraged or let things slide, especially because it's natural to want to justify it.

I've been having major mental issues for over a month now. While I'm good about not letting the lack of motivation negatively impact the snake or hedgehog, I do have a tendency to let care slide with the hermit crabs. I acknowledge it, and I'm still working on ways to fix it and make sure they're getting the care they deserve. This post prompted me to go change their main food bowl, which hasn't been changed for 3-4 days. Not horrible, no (particularly because it's pretty common to leave it for two days since they'll frequently eat as much or more the second night, as scavengers), but also not ideal.

Anyway, here's where the original post is - http://dogsaremypatronus.com/post/139478245410/it-isnt-about-you



> I often talk about ideal pet ownership. I talk about what we should strive for, what responsible pet ownership should look like, and things I believe are necessary for a stable relationship, from both a physiological and behavioral standpoint.
> 
> Now, a topic that sometimes comes up-and this is a conversation I had with a fellow student this morning, which inspired this post-is the immense feeling of guilt some people feel when they see where they should be, and recognize that that isn't where they are.
> 
> ...


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## Katten (May 10, 2014)

This is a fantastic post. I'm mentally ill (bipolar disorder and aspergers syndrome), and it affects all aspects of my life, but I've always made sure that my animals aren't affected by my illness or anything else that happens in my life. My animals are the #1 priority in my life -- everything else comes second. I see the online community making a lot of excuses for mentally ill people when it comes to animals, and I really don't think that's right. Adopting an animal is a promise and a privilege. If you can't care for an animal, you shouldn't get one. Period.


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## twobytwopets (Feb 2, 2014)

I think part of the issue is it's difficult to recognize our shortcomings while we are doing it. That is basically admitting to ourselves that we may not be doing enough. 
For me personally I've had to identify what the bare minimum of care is for just about everything. Then identify how many times in a time period you can do the minimum before there is an issue.


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## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

Agreed, Katten. Your animals are lucky to have you! 

And that's true, Two, but I think that's one of the things the post is saying - that we shouldn't let ourselves become complacent. Pet owners should always be keeping up-to-date on the latest care information, take new information into account, and look at our keeping methods with a critical eye. It's difficult to do sometimes, especially when we're falling short, but how we handle that is what determines whether we're a good pet owner or not. If we decide to protect our feelings & cover up our guilt by insisting that no, everything is fine, and those other people are wrong, we're not handling it correctly. It hurts, but we have to admit that we can be wrong or not the greatest owner, and adjust our methods as needed. It's not a bad thing - no one is the best owner ever, especially not all the time. We're always learning new things and trying to do the best for our animals. 

And that's a good way to approach the issue! And it's also a good way to make yourself look at each pet independently to determine what they need. Bindi's food NEEDS to be changed daily. I don't have an option on that. The hermit crabs are fine if I change every two days or so, especially with the multiple bowls & options they have. The snake doesn't need to be fed on a strict schedule where she's going to starve if I forget to thaw her food a day, like I did yesterday.  I'll feed her tonight & everything will be happy in her world! If I forgot to feed Bindi last night, well...I wouldn't have to deal with escaping maggots? :lol: But I'm sure I would've heard from her about it, and I would've felt MUCH guiltier.


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## twobytwopets (Feb 2, 2014)

Also we should never forget the most important being to create these lists for, ourselves. Depending on what you may be dealing with will make a difference of what is on the "you list."


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## octopushedge (Apr 26, 2015)

Thank you for this. I struggle with bipolar as well, and while Reggie is generally always in good care (though sometimes I don't change his fleece as soon as I should), the husky I watch sometimes can be too much for me. I sometimes have to skip a day or two of walking him. He dawdles and gets into trouble a lot and it's too much to deal with some days. Thankfully my neighbour has a very large backyard so the husky still has somewhere to go, but I admit I feel very guilty at times for not being the best I could be.


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## Lilysmommy (Jan 7, 2009)

You are though! If it's too much to deal with sometimes, it is. That's the best YOU can do, and it's clearly not falling in to neglectful territory - like you said, he still has someplace to go where he can move around more freely, be outside, etc., and it's a day or two. If it were consistently not walking him every day you take care of him, then yeah, that might be an issue. We don't have to be the best ever, just to set our bar so that it challenges us a little, without potentially worsening whatever issues the human might have, while still providing the animal with what they need.

Also, there are things that can be done that aren't walking, that may be easier for you to do with him - training exercises, fetch, flirt pole, etc. Those kinds of things may be less demanding on you (though training could easily be frustrating, especially if you're already in a bad place), but still give him what he needs, like a walk.


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